Jokes About Bagels

Crusty Comedy: Jokes About Bagels

Who doesn’t love a good bagel joke? From puns to riddles, these fun jokes about bagels are sure to bring a smile to your face. Whether you prefer your bagel toasted with cream cheese or just plain with butter, you’re sure to find something here that will make you chuckle. So, grab a bagel, and get ready for some laughs.


One-Liner Jokes About Bagels

One-Liner Jokes About Bagels

Welcome to the world of bagel one-liners! We’ve got a great variety of puns and jokes about everyone’s favorite breakfast food.

Whether you’re looking for a laugh or a groan, we’ve got a bagel joke for you. So grab a schmear of cream cheese and get ready to chuckle at some of our funniest bagel one-liners!

  1. I told a bagel joke, but it was stale.
  2. Bagels are the only bread that can fly, because they’re plane.
  3. I’m on a roll with these bagel jokes.
  4. A bagel that’s a comedian is a doughnut stop laughing.
  5. Bagels are hole-some food.
  6. I met a bagel today, it had everything.
  7. Bagels and donuts are bread in a roundabout way.
  8. A bagel’s favorite music? Poppy seed rock.
  9. Bagels are great, doughn’t you think?
  10. I’m reading a book on bagels, it’s quite a spread.
  11. Bagels are the wheel deal.
  12. A bagel’s life motto: Don’t be plain, be everything!
  13. Bagels are always up for a schmear campaign.
  14. Bagels are the hole truth and nothing but the truth.
  15. A bagel’s favorite sport? Doughnut hole-in-one golf.
  16. Bagels are the best thing since sliced bread.
  17. A bagel’s favorite dance? The twist.
  18. Bagels never sleep, they rest in yeast.
  19. Bagels are the circle of life.
  20. A bagel’s favorite movie? Lord of the Onion Rings.
  21. Bagels are the hole-y grail of breakfast.
  22. Bagels are always on a roll.
  23. Bagels are the best thing round.
  24. A bagel’s favorite day? Fry-day.
  25. Bagels are the king of the bread kingdom, they wear an onion ring.
  26. Bagels are the ultimate food circle.
  27. Bagels don’t like to loaf around.

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Bagel Puns

Bagel Puns

It’s time to get some dough-lightful puns rolling! Bagels are a breakfast staple, and they’re a great way to start off your day with a smile. From sesame seed jokes to cream cheese quips, these bagel puns will have you laughing your way to the bagel shop. So, without further ado, let’s get to the bready-goodness!

Q: Why did the bagel lose the race?
A: Because it couldn’t get a hole in one!

Q: What do you call a bagel that can fly?
A: A plain bagel.

Q: Why was the bagel so good at tennis?
A: Because it had a great serve!

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s gone bad?
A: A rotten doughnut.

Q: Why did the bagel go to the doctor?
A: It had a hole in its heart.

Q: How does a bagel propose?
A: With an onion ring.

Q: What’s a bagel’s favorite dance?
A: The twist!

Q: Why did the bagel get a job?
A: To make some dough.

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s a spy?
A: A sleuth with a hole.

Q: Why did the bagel go to jail?
A: It was caught lox-ing up the cream cheese.

Q: What’s a bagel’s favorite type of music?
A: Rock and roll.

Q: Why was the bagel so smart?
A: Because it was well-bread.

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s a superhero?
A: Super Bagel!

Q: Why did the bagel apply for a loan?
A: It needed more dough.

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s a detective?
A: Sherlock Holmes.

Q: Why don’t bagels ever get bored?
A: Because they’re always in a round.

Q: What’s a bagel’s favorite flower?
A: A poppy seed!

Q: Why did the bagel go to the bar?
A: To get toasted.

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s a magician?
A: David Dough-perfield.

Q: Why did the bagel join the circus?
A: To be part of the doughnut act.

Q: What’s a bagel’s favorite book?
A: Catcher in the Rye.

Q: Why was the bagel so happy?
A: Because it had a hole lot of love.

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s an athlete?
A: A doughnut lift weights.

Q: Why did the bagel go to the beach?
A: To get a tan.

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s a philosopher?
A: Plato.

Q: Why did the bagel go to the moon?
A: To find some space jam.

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s a movie star?
A: A doughnut in the spotlight.

Q: Why did the bagel go to the art gallery?
A: To appreciate the fine arts.

Q: What do you call a bagel that’s a teacher?
A: A roll model.

Q: Why did the bagel go to the bakery?
A: To rise to the occasion.

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Wrapping Up

To conclude, jokes about bagels are not only hilarious but also provide an opportunity to share a laugh with friends and family. Whether you’re a fan of the classic cream cheese and lox combo or a devotee of the everything bagel, these jokes will get everyone in your group chuckling and start off the day on the right note!

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